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Showing posts from March, 2013

Meatfare Sunday

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Today was a good day. This morning we missed Sunday School. Although we knew about daylight saving Spring forward, and all that, our bodies just did not want to cooperate. But that is OK. We made it to Divine Liturgy and that's the most important thing.

Our family did not stay for the Meatfare potluck at coffee hour because Eric stayed home sick and because we have food issues. It's just easier to eat at home. Lunch was just sandwiches. Usually when we get to meatfare Sunday at our house, we are sort of down to the dregs, and so food was basic today: Turkey lunch meat sandwiches for lunch, Pasta with meat sauce for dinner. And Ice cream for dessert. Dairy free ice ceam that is not homemade is meh, but I pretended.

But this afternoon (I'm so thrilled) I actually had energy and I DID STUFF!!!! I did a bit of mending/alterations on a couple of skirts, and I went to Walmart to get some velcro and elastic and the like...and found some fabric on sale for two more …

Pain.

This pain is a prison.
It hems me in.
My body is not free.
Pain is exhausting.
Pain robs me of sleep.
A deep ache in my bones.
Bruises inside my elbows.
Shooting niggles of nerve pain through my side, across my back.
Muscle aches in my shoulders.
Bone aches in my hands and arms.
Tingling in my toes.
Numbness on my feet, crawling up my legs.
Shooting pain in my shoulder that limits its range of motion.

And I’m tired.

Pain feels like a cage.
Am I a canary with clipped wings?
Have I even forgotten how to sing?
Do I have a voice?
Can I still think?

My mind is numb, dealing with pain.
I have thoughts and then I lose them.
But most of the time, I am too dull to think of very much at all.
My body does not work.

But my heart does.
Inside my heart, there is light.
Inside my heart is freedom.
Inside my heart there is joy.

Christ is there.

Heaven is there.
All the Saints are there.
And even when I am too tired from pain to think, or to work…

Here We Go Again

Start with the usual pre-lenten post about anticipation: Menu planning. Recipes. Stack of spiritual books I almost never end up reading. Cutting back on electronic media

Whip up some froth about piety and saintliness.

Add in one's own very sinful human reality. Blend with a half cup of daily grind.

Mix thoroughly.

Allow to simmer for two months.

Lent.

My First Pedicure

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I’m such a clod. No, really, I am. A friend invited me to go get a pedicure together, and I thought that would be a good idea. It was lots of fun. But I felt sort of like an elephant in a china shop...or was the a bull? It doesn’t matter.

The first thing I did wrong, is that I wore normal shoes and socks. My friend came out wearing flip flops, which is a logical thing to wear when one is going to get a pedi. It just never occurred to me. I figured they had magical toenail polish drying wands or something.

So, we get to the salon, which was lovely, and in a rather arty part of town, in a refurbished victorian house. Lovely atmosphere. The chairs were big and decently comfortable, with a foot tub attached to the base. It was all very nice. So I picked a color and a foot lotion, and the lady led me to a chair and I rolled up my pants, took off my shoes and socks (of the brown sweaty variety) and sat down. The water was blissfully hot and felt great everywhere except that…