Eccentric

For years I've been restraining my more eccentric urges, hoping to somehow pass for normal and making myself miserable in the process. Feeling torn and miserable all the time is no way to live. Yes, it's true.

So, I've decided to just go with the flow of who I am and not worry so much about what others might think of this particular middle-aged lady (am I middle aged yet? I'm sure not trying to be young anymore.) Yeah, it's probably a developmental milestone or something that comes along with getting wee little hot flashes.

Too bad they don't make a book called "What to Expect the Thirty-Ninth Year".

I bet wee little hot flashes would be in such a book. As well as finally arriving at the notion that nobody really cares whether one is eccentric or not, so one might as well be as weird as one desires. (All within moral, ethical and religious boundaries, of course). Ha!

So I feel better. I was pretty depressed and shed many tears this past weekend, but I think I'm going to stop beating myself up over my weirdnesses and eccentricities, and go with the flow of who I am. Because maybe, just maybe, God made me this way.