Last night I tried the Salmon, Potato and Peas bake...it was good...but there was not much of it. I was satisfied for about an hour and a half, and then I felt like I needed a snack...luckily that was built in to my budget, so I ate some dry, crunchy gluten free ceral (instead of potato chips) because I was feeling very very stressed and I needed to CRUNCH. (yes, I know I'm a stress eater....I'm working on it, but, babysteps here, and yes, I WILL buy some carrots when I go grocery shopping next).
Today at lunch I had a big salad (tomato, small zucchini, and greens) dressed w/ coconut spray and blasamic vinegar, and some chicken. It wasn't quite enough.
I needed about 150 more calories (remember, I'm doing "free fruits and veggies")...
So I ate a peach with 1/3 cup raw oats sprinkled on, and some "just like sugar" chicory root sweetener. It was so pretty looking in the bowl. I should have taken a picture.
I've noticed that 1800 calories is enough...but it is no way, shape, or form indulgent. It is measured, it is basic, and it is simple. It has to be...
I can't think of this in terms of hoped-for weight loss. Because if I do, I will get angry and discouraged, and self-pitying and more angry and more discouraged, and rebellious and then I will EAT all those feelings and I will be right back where I started or worse...because I not only will have caved in to the food, but also caved in to those negative feelings and allowed myself to dwell in that negative, childish brain space.
It is, quite simply, time to grow up.