Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Gaaaaaaaah!

Ok, stressy week. Yesterday was Bethany's psych testing, which went really well. Our follow up results appt. will be in a couple of weeks.

And doing the psych testing means our Flexible Spending Account (health care money, in other words) is on a bright red EMPTY now. I hate the fact that we can't put more than "a certain amount" in there, and with the medical needs of our family, we spend more than that every year.

So from now on, we get to find a small car payment's worth of money(actually two small car payments or a nice new car payment) fir our 20% copay for medicine into our family budget. I'm so glad we aren't paying the full amount. That would be like a mortgage payment on a nicer house than I've ever owned. I guess this is one reason I don't have a house.

Makes me want to weep.

My new mantra: "theLORDprovidestheLORDprovidestheLORDprovides"....said in a slightly panicky voice.

And that doesn't include our part of the doctor visits yet to be made.

Neurologist tomorrow. Those initial consults are always more expensive than follow up visits. Again: Must remind self: "theLORDprovidestheLORDprovidestheLORDprovides". Yeah. Now I feel so much better. I'll feel better after the fact, when I have a nice story to tell, I suppose.

Meanwhile, I had a ginormous cavity drilled a week or so ago, and now my teeth back there are just oh. so. sensitive, and threats of the root canal that my dentist mentioned, that would be in my future if my tooth is still painful are filling my head (filling...HA! no pun intended). I think I'd rather suck on a clove of garlic and make it go away myself, than need a root canal. I can't afford one. And I REALLY can't afford the cost of a porcelain crown. Really. That's like eight hundred bucks. I don't want to think about it. I really don't.

So, I guess I'll go make a honey-sweetened blueberry pie with my youngest, who wants to learn pie-making, instead.

And later I'll go to vespers and pray.

And life will go on.

And my feelings are just my feelings. And they will go away.

And the roiling drama inside of me will calm down and life as we know it will not come to a screeching halt over any of this. Really, it won't.

The Lord will provide. He always does, you know.

3 comments:

elizabeth said...

yeah... good to be reminded; May the Lord indeed provide for you!

sorry about the tooth pain; happy that B is having more tests, hope they help!

love to you!

margaret said...

And knowing He will provide is never comfortable.

Less so when you have kids. Your Bethany never leaves my prayers (she's saved me from so many onion eyes ;))

thegeekywife said...

hugs!