Tuesday, April 13, 2010

OK, I know I'm weird...BUT

I still need to write this. Today it's in the 80's here. I went to the zoo. My outfit: ankle length straight skirt (not the coolest, I was wishing I had on one of my swirly tiered skirts or a broomstick skirt instead of what I had on...but still), and and ill fitting tank top, pink hoodie (I had to wear my pink hoodie no matter what and I could not take it off due to only having ill fitting tank underneath), sneaks and a bandana to disguise my bad hair day.

I felt SO out of place. And I'll admit, I was too hot, thanks to skirt and jacket.

If I would have worn a tube top, I would have fit in.

If I had been wearing DAISY DUKES with my butt cheeks hanging out, I would have fit in.

If I had been wearing a micro mini skirt, I would have fit in.

If I had been wearing a spaghetti-strapped tank blouse, I would have fit in.

If my nearly strapless sun dress had hit me mid-thigh, I would have fit in.

If I had been wearing short shorts, and a skin tight t shirt, I would have fit in.

What is UP with women's summer time clothing?????

Meanwhile the men are wearing: baggy pants, t-shirts or button shirts and IF they have on shorts, they come below the knee.

Seriously, Ladies...does anyone else see or get the disparity here?

I acknowledge the fact that I missed it when it came to judging the weather, getting dressed this morning, and I could have chosen cooler clothes...BUT STILL.

Why have women completely abdicated their dignity and their modesty? Why, why, why??????

And what kills me, is that if asked, most of these gals would probably call themselves feminists. And yet here they are, completely and blindly participating in the gross sexualization of their persons, leaving NOTHING to the imagination or to mystery.

Modesty, clearly, is a lost art.

How do YOU dress in the summer time? I will readily admit that I'm a little too futsy. I will also admit I have body image issues and that I'm overweight. And that I have a hard time finding the right balance. Really, I do.

BUT STILL!!!!

22 comments:

Hezra said...

yes, I am having these problems cropping up because I too am over my best weight. I don't like my upper arms showing, I don't like things too short-- but those two things would be there no matter how overewight or underweight I was. I am modest, but I think a mid range modesty. I like things to go to my knees and over my shoulders. Though on super hot days I will wear a tank top.(but not usually out places) I like skirts, cool, comfy and pretty. I like sandals and tee shirts. I wear capris even though they are not the best look for me(I am sort so they make me look even shorter!) I am currently thinking of designing my very own summer wardrobe this year AM getting that sewing station together doggonit!

elizabeth said...

one, LOVE your pix you put on of the pink hoodie; great colour on you!

two, I TOTALLY AGREE. where's the mystery? where's the subtle grace that allures discreetly? and

third, I am SO NOT COOL with the Adult fashion designers who are objectifying and sexualizing women and young girls. it is not only insulting it is wrong.

so I agree... there are ways to keep cool (and I am not against more loose fitting tank tops with thicker straps myself where appropriate) and still being fashionable and modest.

Neuropoet said...

I stick mostly to longer, flowing skirts in the summertime - feminine, but very modest. I probably appear "more than modest" to most people, but it's just part of who I am. My hubby likes it too :) - the "mystery" and the femininity. It's a shame more women don't understand the value of modesty - it grants a dignity, a mystery, and a "lady-like" air to she who possesses it! :)

Anonymous said...

I also went to the zoo over spring break with my preteen daughter. We were both dressed modestly and were out of place as well. One woman was actually walking around in a bikini top and cut off short shorts. I thought bikini's were for the beach only? And what ever happened to dress codes? Do places even have them anymore, and if so, do they even bother to enforce them?

Ο ΓΡΑΦΩΝ said...

Hello.

During the summer I usually wear long skirts (lower calf or longer) and shirts with sleeves that reach my elbows. I do stick out. It gets really hot in Greece during the summer and all that cloth is rather provocative.
When i started dressing this way, 7-8 years ago, it all felt awkward. I was very young as well, which didn't help very much. However as years go by, i don't care as much about how i look and what people think. I have come to think that, as christians, we are "supposed" to stick out and "be weird". Not in a way that seeks to draw attention or highlight "spirituality" but, while trying to follow God's will, we drift away from most worldly practices. So, we stick out.And people around us might not be able to cope with that and sometimes might react in strange manners. But Christ said "Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you" .
And then He said
"You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? ... You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hid... Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven."
These words have been great help to me. So i say you keep it up!
Thanks for posting this, it helped me a lot to re-think all that.

A lurking reader and...sporadic commenter:)

Athena

Ο ΓΡΑΦΩΝ said...

footnote: i don't seem to be able to write a not oversized text, sorry.....

margaret said...

A culture that has had the leaven of Christianity removed is going to become base and lumpen very quickly – we see it in the obsession with sex in the basest, crudest form and in the resurrection of the old classical mores of homosexuality and ‘honourable’ suicide (aka euthanasia) and in the cheapening of women – in the past it was for sex and breeding and now it’s only for sex but most women are wired to want a man and go along with it having no alternatives. As far as most of these women are concerned they believe if they wore a long skirt and a long sleeved tee no man would look at them.

In summer I wear long linen or cotton skirts, long sleeve tees or Anokhi print tops. We can’t get the scarves here more’s the pity but there is a store called East owned by the same family as Anokhi that sells some clothes in the same fabrics. Lovely, light, long sleeved, good length but the fastenings start mid-cleavage (!) forcing me to resort to grandmother’s friend, the safety pin, but apart from that I really like them. On the other hand summer is Scotland is probably a brisk spring day to you.

mamajuliana said...

I have bad legs and bad arms. I am doing the world a BIG favor by not showing them all that extra skin movement when I wave!

Two summers ago I decided to try to make it through the hot weather still wearing my 3/4 length sleeves. I made it through, but some days were a struggle. Some times I wear a sleeveless shirt and put a 3/4 shirt over it left open...just so a little breeze can get through.

I usually wear swirly light skirts or light loose jeans/capris f we are hiking...

That is what I cam comfortable in. I can't see how women can be comfortable with most of there body parts out for the world to see. I think that it is possible to dress for hot weather without looking like a lady of the evening!

I wonder, too, what those girls are thinking. Do they want men to look at them and think of them in that fashion?

My husband hates summer just for that reason. We were just talking the other day when we were out and the weather was warm. He said he feels violated when he has to look at women dressed in such a fashion. He should have to constantly be placed in those types of situations...

Has said...

I agree Alana! For summer in australia I always wear thin cotton, nothing fitted (when will people figure out that tight=too hot?), and cover from the sun if I can (skin cancer capital of the world). Have you read Wendy Shalit's books? You'd love them. All about modesty.

BelleArtMom said...

It was about 80 here in KC yesterday, too, and I wore my summer uniform: lightweight cotton broomstick skirt, cap sleeve t-shirt, sandals. My dh told me when we used to go to the Methodist church he couldn't believe how the teenaged girls dressed at *church*! Boobs hanging out everywhere, he said if you are a male, you try not to look but you end up doing that anyway. He was amazed to be confronted with that at church.

Anonymous said...

I wear what I think is appropriate for the occasion. I have lots of long skirts for church,and also some that are just below the knee for running about. But on an outing such as the zoo, nice capri pants are good. They give coverage to the thighs, but let in cool air. Pair that with a gauze shirt that buttons down the front over a tank and you are cool and covered well. The fabric store has beautiful gauze materials, both thin for shirts and heavier for capris or skirts.

Since you are a seamstress, you can make all these pieces easily and get the right amount of coverage and fit.

As to the young girls, it is sad. The more flesh they can expose, the happier they are. There is no such thing as modesty; I think most of them shop at Sluts R Us.

Alana said...

Folks, let me clarify...these were NOT teenage girls dressed like this. These were MOTHERS.

Gag.

I love the broomstick skirt and t-shirt thing for summer, too. I think I need new t-shirts this year.

Tabitha said...

My husband has shared similar frustrations. He used to love to swim; he was on the swim team in high school and lifeguarded in the summer. Now its like pulling teeth to get him to help me take the kids to the YMCA pool. When I asked him why, he told me he can't stand being surrounded by so much flesh in such skimpy excuses for swimsuits-even on women who are certainly old enough to know better. He can't help monitor the kids if his eyes are glued to his feet. I certainly don't blame him for not wanting to fill his eyes with those sights!

The more I think about it, the more I wonder if perhaps my soon-to-be-nine-year-old boy would be better off not going there too. The place is practically pornographic! I resent that my husband has lost an activity that he loves and that I have lost his help and have to worry about the mental purity of my sons all because modern women think it is their right to objectify themselves! And that doesn't even address the difficulty of finding a modest suit with an attractive fabric in a price that I can consider reasonable for my daughter who will just outgrow it in a season.

Blessings to all of you as we brace ourselves for the downside of the sunny seasons. I must say, I'm glad the sun is shining!

emily said...

I'm a jeans, flip-flops and t-shirt kind of gal. I love wearing skirts in the summertime, but jeans are more versatile when I'm working and crawling around all over the place photographing kids and dogs.

I feel like, around here, people are generally pretty modest. Or I'm just clueless and not noticing AT ALL what other people wear. I do my best to find shirts that are a little "dressier" and less I'm-a-bummy-twenty-something, and shopping has generally been easy.

Guess I should consider myself blessed <3

BelleArtMom said...

I think the teenage girls dress that way because their moms dress like they are teenagers! I agree about the swimming pool, my son just turned 10 and maybe that's not such a good place to hang out. My dad just moved to a condo with a private pool, we might spend some time there with the old people!

Victoria said...

( .)(. )
( x)(x )
<:-P

Blech. Since I'm on a college campus I get an eyeful of it EVERY DAY. Totally undignified, ugly, blechhy stuff.

I work in an over-air-conditioned office so heat is not really the issue for me. I wear skirts that come at least to the knee and are not tight. I refuse to wear sleeveless to the office, so I always wear a light crocheted sweater over anything sleeveless. I am willing to wear a scoop-neck top but not one that shows cleavage if I cross my arms.

What I would REALLY LOVE is if the Indian fashion of the salwar kameez would come into serious acceptance in the USA. Completely modest, but as cool as you can get. Also, no body image issues with a salwar -- it is both fitted and flowy in exactly the right places!

Veiled Glory said...

I just wonder what the LOOKS will be from the Barbie house-mummsies at the clubhouse pool when I arrive in swim leggings, skirt, and sun-shielding sleeved top. ;-) "Oh, poor dear, she probably burns easily."

Anonymous said...

I hate clothes. My summer uniform is homemade long a-line skirts (between knee and ankle in length) and store-bought short sleeve t-shirts (female cut/style) with a variety of cardigans. Cardies are t-shirt material on hottest days, cotton sweater knit, etc. All mix and match in my basic colors (neutrals of black, charcoal gray, and white, with greens, pinks, yellow, turquoise for my colors). Everything solid colors, no prints. Very effortless, cool, comfortable. My homemade skirts are denim, linen blend, jersey knit, poly/cotton broadcloth, whatever. I actually get complimented on my clothes frequently, which surprises me considering how little effort and care goes into my system. I do get stared at I guess in the height of summer when I'm in long shirts and sleeves at three-quarter length, and everyone else is half naked. :) I'm in my mid 30's and left that behind, praise God.

Dollymama said...

So often it is not rewarding to fit in. :)

Most summer clothing that I see others wear isn't stuff I would be willing to wear. I don't do cleavage. I don't even bend forward without a hand automatically going up to hold my shirt from sagging out. Don't do shorts any more. (more because of the looks of my legs as related to my level of vanity, so....not exactly a virtuous reason) Basically I do cropped pants and jeans and tshirts a lot.

margaret said...

And you believe that, Tabitha? Geez Louise, talk about a married woman's fantasy.

Xenia Kathryn said...

Unfortunately girls and women just buy "whatever" is available at the mall. They don't put much thought beyond "Do I look good/hot?"

I wish more women understood that clothes were meant to fit and flatter in a respectful fashion. We really weren't just meant to walk into a store and expect to look great in whatever is hanging on the rack. There was as time when Home Ec. was required in schools and most girls learned how to sew their own clothes.

Some of the best dressed people I know are women who make their own clothes (or know how to alter store-bought stuff accordingly). And, some of the most beautiful, tasteful, intriguing clothes I find at the thrift store turn out to be vintage and handmade.

I hope to sew more clothes for myself (I'm 8 mos. pregnant now) in the future. I always feel so much better, more confident and pretty in something I made. I wish more women "empowered" themselves and invested time and energy into creating lovely, attractive, yet respectful clothing/ outfits. (Not that sewing your own clothes is the "only" way-- not at all).

Sorry for the ramblings!

Alana said...

I agree about sewing one's own clothes. I get more compliments, and feel more comfortable in things I've made according to my own dimensions.

Unfortunately, the garment fabric selection at most fabric stores leaves much to be desired, and when ordering on-line one risks receiving a lower quality fabric than one would have chose at a brick-and-mortar store.